Learning To Drive: Nervous Wreck 3940

Yep, don't drive with your mother. I made that mistake and was also a bit of a nervous wreck at times while learning. The final straw was when I made a wrong turn, and she started screaming in panic as though a semi trailer was barelling down on us. After that I would only drive with my father who was the complete opposite, often falling asleep, so I didn't get any instruction whatsoever.

The best person you can learn to drive with is a trained professional driving instructor. In Australia, cars belonging to driving schools have a brake pedal for the front pbuttenger, I'd buttume this is the go in the US too? Meaning if you're about to pull a risky move, the driving instructor has the power to stop you from doing so, so they won't freak out. Yes driving schools will cost you a bit of money, but what you learn will be invaluable for your driving skills. If you just learn from your parents, you will be taught the same mistakes that they make.

If money is tight and driving schools are not an option, ask the most level headed people you know if they will help teach you to drive. As most people think they're a top of the line driver, I dare say that pretty much anyone you ask will be honoured that you apparently think their driving is good enough for you think them to be worthy of teaching you to drive. I say ask some people, instead of a person, because everybody's driving style is different, it's good to get a bit of experience with a few different people.

Remember that when you're driving, *you* are in control of the vehicle, *you* and only you may decide when it is safe to go at an intersection or in any other situation. *You* are directly responsible for the lives of anyone in the car, nobody else, *you* are the boss when behind the steering wheel. If you make a mistake it is because *you* made a mistake, not anyone else in the vehicle. If you have people in the car who are carrying on like morons, tell them to shut the f*** up, if someone turns the radio up too loud, turn it down. Remember, *you* are in charge. If any of your pbuttengers have a problem with you being in charge, stop the car. This applies when you're learning to drive, and for the rest of your life. However don't get offended if a pbuttenger points out a mistake while you're learning, after all, you are learning.

While you're learning if your pbuttenger tells you to do something and you don't think it's a good idea, then don't do it, ask them to explain why they want you to do it, after all you're learning. Once when I was learning I was sitting at an intersection waiting for it to clear so I could go, my mother yelled *go go go, go now* as a motorcycle was coming that she hadn't seen. If I had gone I would've had an accident, and as the driver that failed to give way, I would've been directly and legally responsible. Do you have to have some sort of sign on your car in NY to let everyone else know you're a learner driver? If that is the case and the sign is clearly displayed, the people behind you can wait if you want to allow a bit of extra time while you work out how traffic flow works. Adding a minute or two to their driving time won't kill them, but rushing things while you're learning because you're worried about the people behind you, mightn't have such a good outcome for you.

The most important thing to remember while driving is that every single other road user is a homicidal maniac who is going to try and kill you unexpectedly at any moment. Expect the unexpected, trust your intuition. If you think someone is about to pull a stupid move and cut you off, then they're probably going to do it, get ready to brake. A proactive driver who anticipates that someone else is going to do something stupid and prepares to take evasive action *before* they do it, will have far more chance of avoiding an accident than a driver who drives along without paying full attention to the road, and who only reacts to a situation *after* is has happened.

All that said, the most important thing is to relax, stay calm and level headed, and enjoy driving. :-)

Cheers, SL.