intense fear of driving

Hello. I'm 24 years old and have a anxiety disorder called ocd. If you have seen on tv or maybe the movie aviator some people have a intense fear of germs. In my case its driving.

I was so fearful of driving that I didnt start until I was 18 and then only 6 minutes to work and back or the local store. I'm driving a lot more now but instead of being comforted I am bothered even more.

There was a time I made a left turn right in front of someone. I was watching the road both ways while they slipped out from a parking lot in just a blink of a eye. Even this situation made me feel unfit to drive. since then I almost never make a left turn unless its absolutely required.

Also a while back my girlfriend pressured me to driving her to work while we stayed in chicago. I was in no way ready to drive there and should have refused. In the blinding sun I ended up going right through a red light, one of my biggest fears. thankfully again no one was hurt.

My current fear is running this light where I have to cross a highway on my way to work. There are service roads along the highway so you have to watch for 2 lights to become green. I work nights and on monday morning I go in at 330am. Some monday mornings are just downright painful to keep my eyes open.

I have a terrible fear of falling asleep and running through this light. We normally go in at 10pm and for a while I was in the habit of driving home at 330am for lunch which just made me dead tired. Since then I just stay in the parking lot at work and I feel a little safer.

I also have a fear of getting confused and running this light. If you've ever had days of "brain cloud" or whatever you call where your mind is so anxious you know what I mean. I mean how do I know anyone or myself couldnt run this thing and hit me.

If I was t-boned by a semi coming down the road at 55mph it would probly be instant rest or long and painfull rest. On the plus side I always wear a seat belt but dont know if it would help much in this situation.

I have looked online and sickened to see 40,000 plus people die every year. thats over 400,000 people in 10 years! Its like a war with mbutt casualties yet people give it no thoughts. I look at cars like a coffin with wheels.

I drive a 95 s-10 and was curious how safe a light truck like that is? i dont really need a truck and was wondering if I should look into another vehicle?

anyway thanks for reading all of this. this is serious question and really how I feel about driving so if your going to make fun hold it to yourself.

thanks